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Thread: Felder on Facebook!

  1. #101
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Quote Originally Posted by chaim View Post
    Haha, at least he gets attention. He seems to need it.
    I mean since the firing in 2001, you can see year-after-year why he and Glenn would have been electricity and water. Totally opposite personality types and two very different men. And you can see how Felder would be absolutely draining to be around. If Felder struggles this much with all relationships, after awhile you have to look at the common denominator - Don Felder. All of the people he's had falling outs or had breakups with couldn't have all been wrong or bad people or "the problem". It leaves only one to blame.

    I personally believe Felder is a vulnerable-type narcissist. Instead of the malignant narcissism or grandiose-type that most people think of when they think of a narcissist, those types of people are sneaky about it, passive-aggressive, and will needle you to death over a period of time. In a way, it's even worse than out and out narcissism if there is such a thing. At least the outwardly types are obvious to figure out and avoid. These types of people like Felder you often don't realize how they are until you get close to them and by then the emotional abuse has already set in and those people are energy vampires and are draining to be around. Yet what they really yearn for is true connection but they don't realize they are driving people away. Had Felder been more self-confident and aware in his real strengths and realized he wasn't going to be like Glenn, it would have been a whole different tale of events not only for Don Felder but likely for the entire Eagles band and their fans. The band breaking up may not have even happened. But Glenn was going to make darn sure he wasn't going to do it twice. And thus we have the firing of Don Felder. A right move IMO. The band probably felt closer than ever afterwards and certainly everyone would have been relieved to not have toxicity in the "workplace". I can only imagine Felder's last call to Glenn and how it must have sounded. It's just lame.

    In the same breath though, I DO think Felder has had a rough go of it in the last 20 or so years especially. I would argue a lot of this is by his own making, but I also believe he truly feels victimized and isn't just claiming to be. That doesn't mean he has been, but I feel like he truly thinks he has been wronged. In that regard I share my sympathy with Felder. I want him to be happy. He certainly influenced my life along with the rest of our guys and he's a masterful musician, however troubled he may be. He deserves to feel content. But I think him feeling victimized has just caused him to be more insecure and feel the need for more attention and respect he feels entitled to. Hence his own self-named band, him singing the songs, being center stage where he probably thought he belonged (yet didn't IMO), etc. But it all started with his whining and needling Don and Glenn in the 70s and decompensated from there. I think in actuality, Felder probably has a lot of regrets, but he's making the same mistakes over and over. After awhile, it's harder and harder to feel sorry for Felder and you just want to gently smack some sense into him and enlighten him to his own behavior and humble him a little in terms of what he's good at and isn't good at, and have him be truly self-confident in what he does do great and realize he was never meant to be a leader or an A-type person like Glenn and that is perfectly okay and he isn't a lesser person simply for not being frontman material or a leader. Sadly, he feels he always was, and just feels like he's been oppressed.

  2. #102
    Stuck on the Border Topkat's Avatar
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    Wow haven't been here in a long time, but l see nothing has changed much with the Felder bashing. Love the psychological diagnosis. Oh boy what nerve. You don't even know the guy, call him a narcissist. Omg. Now l know why l never come here anymore.
    Ive had the pleasure of seeing his show several times in the past few years & he has been gracious, nice, friendly. Hes doing very well & dosen't need any help from you armchair psychiatrist here. Hes not bitter & not playing victim. WHEN ARE PEOPLE GOING TO STOP THIS BS OVER HIM & GLENN. ITS BEEN OVER 20 YEARS AGO. GET OVER IT. LEAVE FELDER ALONE. HE DOESNT NEED YOU AS A DR OR A FAN. HES DOING JUST FINE

  3. #103
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Welcome back. 😁

  4. #104
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Quote Originally Posted by chaim View Post
    Welcome back. 😁

  5. #105
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Quote Originally Posted by Topkat View Post
    Wow haven't been here in a long time, but l see nothing has changed much with the Felder bashing. Love the psychological diagnosis. Oh boy what nerve. You don't even know the guy, call him a narcissist. Omg. Now l know why l never come here anymore.
    Ive had the pleasure of seeing his show several times in the past few years & he has been gracious, nice, friendly. Hes doing very well & dosen't need any help from you armchair psychiatrist here. Hes not bitter & not playing victim. WHEN ARE PEOPLE GOING TO STOP THIS BS OVER HIM & GLENN. ITS BEEN OVER 20 YEARS AGO. GET OVER IT. LEAVE FELDER ALONE. HE DOESNT NEED YOU AS A DR OR A FAN. HES DOING JUST FINE
    You don't have to know him to make assumptions on his behavior, Topkat. That's the thing about Don Felder. He puts all of this out into the public ether for all to see and while it takes a doctor to make an official diagnosis, it doesn't take one to call someone what they are acting like and being like and there is videographic evidence (interviews, the HOTE doc, etc) and written evidence of him (the tell-all book, press, etc) being so. I mean the man wrote the book that could tell you all you'd ever need to know about Felder. The man is a narcissist IMO. Just stating it clearly. A subtle narcissist, but one none the less. Felder is not IMO what I would call a humble guy. Not in the slightest. I never claimed to be diagnosing him as a doctor. But again, Felder makes it quite plain. And he keeps doing it and finding himself in drama year after year. He won't ever grow up.

    Maybe this isn't the forum for you if you keep leaving, or you know, you could just ignore these posts and go post something positive in the Felder positivity thread. But the fact is a lot of us here don't like Felder's whiny passive aggressive personality. And we call a spade a spade. And for the record some people *do* like Felder and sympathize if not outright excuse his behavior. That's totally fine too. They are entitled to see Felder as they see fit. As am I! I should know, I used to be blind to his real personality. One that would be offputting to almost anyone truth be told. But hey, we don't have to agree on Felder or Glenn. I personally think Glenn is the MVP of this band and always will be. And I think with all of his faults, he always did right by his band and was right in showing Don Felder the door in 2001. He saved the Eagles by doing so. I'll believe that until I die.

    So do as you wish, but this "armchair psychiatrist" is just clearing the air and giving his non-professional opinion on what he sees and probably will continue to do so when the next Felder drama news comes up. Unless I say otherwise, my posts are almost always my opinion on a public forum. Take them, leave them, etc. That's your right. And it's your right to speak up how you feel too. Feel free to vehemently disagree with me or give me reasons you don't think he is as I say and how I might be wrong and we can have a civil debate about it, as message boards are usually for. Or just ignore me. That's ok too. Some will agree with me, some won't. Yet the world keeps turning. C'est la vie!

    PS: It's generally considered to be bad online etiquette to post full sentences or entire posts in all caps. If you want to use it to highlight a single word for emphasis that's fine but to put entire sentences in caps online is the equivalent to and seems like you are shouting which you don't need to do to get your point across whatever it may be.

  6. #106
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Quote Originally Posted by WalshFan88 View Post
    You don't have to know him to make assumptions on his behavior, Topkat. That's the thing about Don Felder. He puts all of this out into the public ether for all to see and while it takes a doctor to make an official diagnosis, it doesn't take one to call someone what they are acting like and being like and there is videographic evidence (interviews, the HOTE doc, etc) and written evidence of him (the tell-all book, press, etc) being so. I mean the man wrote the book that could tell you all you'd ever need to know about Felder. The man is a narcissist IMO. Just stating it clearly. A subtle narcissist, but one none the less. Felder is not IMO what I would call a humble guy. Not in the slightest. I never claimed to be diagnosing him as a doctor. But again, Felder makes it quite plain. And he keeps doing it and finding himself in drama year after year. He won't ever grow up.

    Maybe this isn't the forum for you if you keep leaving, or you know, you could just ignore these posts and go post something positive in the Felder positivity thread. But the fact is a lot of us here don't like Felder's whiny passive aggressive personality. And we call a spade a spade. And for the record some people *do* like Felder and sympathize if not outright excuse his behavior. That's totally fine too. They are entitled to see Felder as they see fit. As am I! I should know, I used to be blind to his real personality. One that would be offputting to almost anyone truth be told. But hey, we don't have to agree on Felder or Glenn. I personally think Glenn is the MVP of this band and always will be. And I think with all of his faults, he always did right by his band and was right in showing Don Felder the door in 2001. He saved the Eagles by doing so. I'll believe that until I die.

    So do as you wish, but this "armchair psychiatrist" is just clearing the air and giving his non-professional opinion on what he sees and probably will continue to do so when the next Felder drama news comes up. Unless I say otherwise, my posts are almost always my opinion on a public forum. Take them, leave them, etc. That's your right. And it's your right to speak up how you feel too. Feel free to vehemently disagree with me or give me reasons you don't think he is as I say and how I might be wrong and we can have a civil debate about it, as message boards are usually for. Or just ignore me. That's ok too. Some will agree with me, some won't. Yet the world keeps turning. C'est la vie!

    PS: It's generally considered to be bad online etiquette to post full sentences or entire posts in all caps. If you want to use it to highlight a single word for emphasis that's fine but to put entire sentences in caps online is the equivalent to and seems like you are shouting which you don't need to do to get your point across whatever it may be.

    I've got to disagree with you, I believe felder is the opposite of a narcissist, I believe felder is as humble as he can be, despite the way he got treated so poorly by Henley and Frey. I mean if you wanna talk about someone being a narcissist, then... i think you would have to give that to Henley. I mean was it really necessary to crop out Felder out of the new La Forum 76 vinyl album ?? I mean come on now Felder basically made that song. I mean henley acts like the Hotel California album was his and Glenn's album, which it was NOT , they themselves together only wrote two of the songs on that album, the rest either included the other guys or did not even include Henley and Frey, plus I mean really Henley are you really going to give yourself the most song credit for hotel california How narcissistic can you be to change the song credits and put Felder last when he wrote 95% of that song. Even in Felder's concerts which i have been to, he gives props to the guys and gives credibility and no where does he ever take full credit for anything, unlike Glenn and Henley and who do the complete opposite. Go ahead and listen to any of their HFO audio bootleg concerts, whenever they perform lyin' eyes and one of these nights at the end of their first set , they always give commentary on those two songs and how they are from their OOTN album. Yet in every concert the same phrase is said by Glenn " Here is a song created by me and Henley" " Heres a song that Don (Henley) and I made in 1975" "Here is a song from Don (Henley) and I satanic rhythm and blues period" No where does he ever mention felder who helped come up with one of these nights and he even created that iconic opening bass sound in the beginning that everyone loves, so in reference to your comment on felder, i think he is as humble, thankful, and respectful as a human can be, Even though he deserves a lot more credibility and respect.

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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Quote Originally Posted by edwardd19 View Post
    I've got to disagree with you, I believe felder is the opposite of a narcissist, I believe felder is as humble as he can be, despite the way he got treated so poorly by Henley and Frey. I mean if you wanna talk about someone being a narcissist, then... i think you would have to give that to Henley. I mean was it really necessary to crop out Felder out of the new La Forum 76 vinyl album ?? I mean come on now Felder basically made that song. I mean henley acts like the Hotel California album was his and Glenn's album, which it was NOT , they themselves together only wrote two of the songs on that album, the rest either included the other guys or did not even include Henley and Frey, plus I mean really Henley are you really going to give yourself the most song credit for hotel california How narcissistic can you be to change the song credits and put Felder last when he wrote 95% of that song. Even in Felder's concerts which i have been to, he gives props to the guys and gives credibility and no where does he ever take full credit for anything, unlike Glenn and Henley and who do the complete opposite. Go ahead and listen to any of their HFO audio bootleg concerts, whenever they perform lyin' eyes and one of these nights at the end of their first set , they always give commentary on those two songs and how they are from their OOTN album. Yet in every concert the same phrase is said by Glenn " Here is a song created by me and Henley" " Heres a song that Don (Henley) and I made in 1975" "Here is a song from Don (Henley) and I satanic rhythm and blues period" No where does he ever mention felder who helped come up with one of these nights and he even created that iconic opening bass sound in the beginning that everyone loves, so in reference to your comment on felder, i think he is as humble, thankful, and respectful as a human can be, Even though he deserves a lot more credibility and respect.
    Hey, I give you serious props for laying out an actual argument...thanks for that! I may disagree with you but I can understand some of your viewpoints or at least where you are coming from.

    I just think Felder's victim mentality hurt him big time and that Henley and Frey were naturally always going to be the leaders and the breadwinners of that band. I mean as great as George Harrison and Ringo Starr were, John Lennon and Paul McCartney got most of the praise, most of the money later on, and were most successful and known. That doesn't mean the others aren't important, but they aren't equal in importance to Don and Glenn or John and Paul. And I agree with Frey's stance on wanting more money. You may very well disagree. I think he's full of himself but rather than being boastful about it, he's more passive aggressive and just seems to have a sense of entitlement and a chronic need for attention.

    And I think Felder's personality type is draining to be around. He seems like a malcontent, as was Henley but Henley had other things that made up for it. As wrong as that may be. Felder didn't. Felder just seems like he's always going around playing the victim or feeling like he's been mistreated not only by Don and Glenn but by some of his romantic partners and it just strikes me as that he's the common denominator. Hey, I feel the same about Taylor Swift. After awhile, you have to be the one with the problem, not dozens of other people you've had bad experiences with.

    I don't feel sorry for Felder at times when I hear of yet more drama, but at times I do have some sympathy. I think he probably has some regrets about how he handled things, but yet at times he keeps making the same mistakes. But it is sad that he's always felt maligned by people. And that would be hard to deal with. I just really hope he finds inner peace at some point in his life and finds the right person for him and quits trying to be someone he's clearly not meant to be (a frontman/singer/leader).

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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    A couple of comments on discussion above:

    The announcement that opens Felder's concerts doesn't paint a picture of a humble guy. IMO. Or repeatedly talking about himself and how he became what he is in the space of a song in concerts. (I consider the OOTN intro bass as part of the arrangement, not songwriting. But what a great bit of arranging!) I won't discuss this narcissim thing here, but humbleness, sure. And I personally don't think he's that humble.

    I didn't like it one bit either when I heard Glenn introduce TITTL as a song he and Don wrote. And HC should have always been a Felder/Henley/Frey song.

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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Btw, Topkat, my "welcome back" wasn't mean't as an insult. I was laughing at us all - including me and you and, of course, Austin. 😁

  10. #110
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    Default Re: Felder on Facebook!

    Agreed chaim, with your points on Felder. I agree that the writing credits of HC are Felder/Henley/Frey and should be.

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