I recently had my yearly fest that my family holds on our cabin at the lake. There is a big stage and all of my friends and musicians come and play and it's for free and it's always a big crowd. We even provide food and non-alcoholic drinks until we run out. You bring your beer, chair, etc. Side dishes welcome. So, it's that kind of thing. It started as a surprise birthday party for me in 2010, named after me as a play on the classic Ozzfest concert. It's called Ausfest, lol. We strongly encourage EVERYONE of any genre or skill level to get up and play and/or sing for a bit. We invited a new guy this year. He bought something from a family member, and he said he played guitar. So the family member gave him my number, and I invited him. So on the day of the party he brought his Fender Telecaster and tiny amp and he looked like he was trying to be Merle Haggard or something. Leather cowhide guitar strap and all. Now, we will play a mix of music to be versatile and welcoming, but the dominant theme amongst most of the players, especially those that have been coming for years is classic rock and roll music and the fact we crank up loud, play loud, and sing loud through a nice big PA system. I love it and look forward to it every single year.

This guy came in, as the newest member of the "jam team". We were all rotating turns on stage and he got up with me and 3 other guys. Normally common courtesy at open mic or jam sessions like you'd find at a blues club, is that you take turns doing your song vs everyone else's. This guy insisted we play Merle Haggard song after Merle Haggard song, and then Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson and Buck Owens and Johnny Cash. Keep in mind I'd rather get a root canal than listen to a Merle Haggard song, lol, but I do keep my bias to the side when this jam happens to accommodate everyone to the best of our abilities. It kept going on and on and on. He was ruling his "band" with an iron fist. I finally interjected and kicked off a rock song, which ironically was "Already Gone", lol. After the song was over he said smugly "Ok, that was interesting. Now let's go back to playing country music!". I told him straight up he is not the host, he is not going to hog the setlist or the spotlight, and that we do a mix of music and the songs that everyone onstage at that time wants to do. He's not just a guest. But the new guy. The guy I invited. Evidently this gentleman never had to share any toys or play in a sandbox with other kids. Sadly, he was about 70. Old enough to know better. He thought he was great, took all of the guitar solos, and he was basically going to do his darnedest to just take over and become the leader of the band. But this isn't just a band.

So, after informing him that we SHARE the roles of singing, playing, and choosing songs - he literally unplugged his amp, grabbed it, slung his guitar behind his back, walked off, got in his truck, and left. Needless to say, he will not ever be getting up on an Ausfest stage any time soon. If he shows up next year he will promptly be escorted. We don't have any official security with badges and radios, lol, but there are a few guys that hang close to the stage that will be informed of his so called "ban", lol. And if I have to, I will be there to tell him it won't be happening. We try to welcome everyone of all styles and genres and abilities.

It ended up souring the whole day. The audience was unhappy because most of them want to hear rock. They don't mind a few country, blues, or metal songs. But they were unhappy with the way this guy was trying to take over. They were unhappy also because they knew we the musicians were unhappy. After this guy left, I ended up going in the restroom and just having a full on panic attack. I felt all of this coming onto MY shoulders as the host. The audience was upset at the guy, the musicians were upset that the guy I invited was a jerk, and I felt like I had let everyone down. Now in my moment of turmoil, I didn't realize that no one was unhappy with me, if anything they were unhappy that I had to go through this. I had people coming over to me because they could tell I was "off". I brushed myself off, got back onstage, and we got back to having fun. We still played a couple more country songs, but it was because we wanted to, and we all shared in taking the lead vocal and guitar, and we all had no power hunger. It was actually fun.

Do not show up to an open jam you were invited to and try to say it was too rock and roll or too loud or any of that. We WILL play a few songs you want to do. If we don't know them, we will follow you. Over the years the core musicians of the jam have been good at following someone playing a song we are unfamiliar with. We know when to sit it out if we are worried it will affect the song. Maybe this guy should try to broaden his horizons, lose the ego, practice more, and not be a curmudgeon. I never attack anyone's abilities unless they try to be arrogant. Then you're fair game in my opinion. I know I'm not Eddie Van Halen. But I'm confident in that I can play. Humility goes a long way with a musician. Heck, even humans in general! I love rockstars who are humble and act like they are no different than the rest of us. Ugh! Why is it that old stick in the mud men are always on my mind?! Lol. I hate stuffy people. I know that sounds bad to some, but I've had so many experiences with people who are too prim and proper and try to proselytize.