Other than doctor appointments, tests, or hospital stays, I have no intentions of going into any establishment until the COVID-19 pandemic has slowed way down or we have a vaccine that is readily available.

My folks will go to the grocery store/pharmacy, but that's about it. I'm not even doing that. They are careful to wear N95 masks and wipe everything down with Clorox and let non-cold groceries stay outside to air out. It's a big deal to us. I'm pretty weak health-wise and that's just how it is. We all assume that any possible exposure can equal tragedy. I fear that I'm just one big adrenal crisis away from dying at this point.

My mortality is something that is on my mind a lot lately. I've had a fear of death for many years. Prior to COVID, I've had some close calls and medical emergencies in the last 3 or so years that make me really nervous. I had my first adrenal crisis, and then didn't have another for quite a few years, then seemingly I've had one almost every other year. I think I'm 2 years out since my last one, thankfully, but I've had to increase my medicine. When I first started treatment, I took 5. Then I went up to 10, then 15, and then now I'm on 20. I've been told even a bad anxiety attack could put me in the red zone for cortisol. If I'm really struggling, I'm to take an extra 5mg that day of cortisone. And if I'm sick, I'm to take 10mg. Any fever above 101 and I'm to take 40mg and call the office to have my endocrinologist or his physician's assistant/nurse practitioner paged. And I have a kit with syringes and vials of dexamethasone to inject intramuscularly if I'm in a bad way or can't get to an ER. They would prefer I have intravenous dexamethasone considering it works quicker, but the shots are backup if we are far away, or I'm not going to make the trip without a problem and I need something to literally tide me over until we get there.

The whole COVID-19 thing just makes me that much more fearful. When the ER doc paged my orthopedic surgeon after my broken femur and he said "send him home, and we'll try nonoperative treatment and have him come see me tomorrow in the office to discuss a plan and xrays", I knew. The ER doc said that COVID is rampant at the hospital where my orthopedic surgeon works (which is the biggest Illinois hospital that is downstate from Chicago), and that if I got COVID "it wouldn't be good". Yeah, I know. It's something that I'm going to take seriously, just lay low, do everything I can to stay safe and promote awareness.