Good for a Laugh

[Glennsallnighter]

Please excuse this one, the kids brought it in a few days ago and my 3 year old son just keeps repeating it to everyone

Knock Knock!

Who's There?

Banana

Banana who?

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Orange

Orange who?

Orange you glad you I didn't say Banana

[Billy]

After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limo, and He doesn't travel light), the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb
'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver,
'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?'
'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I'd really like to drive today.'
'I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! And what if something should happen?' protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.
'There might be something extra in it for you,' says the Pope.
Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.
'Please slow down, Your Holiness!!!' pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens. 'Oh, dear God, I'm gonna lose my license,' moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.
'I need to talk to the Chief,' he says to the dispatcher.
The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five.
'So bust him,' says the Chief.
'I don't think we want to do that, he's really important,' said the cop.
The Chief exclaimed, 'All the more reason!'
'No, I mean really important,' said the cop.
The Chief then asked, 'Who ya got there, the Mayor?'
Cop: 'Bigger.'
Chief: 'Governor?'
Cop: 'Bigger.'
'Well,' said the Chief, 'Who is it?'
Cop: 'I think it's God!'
Chief: 'What makes you think it's God?'
Cop: 'He's got the Pope as a chauffeur!'

[Ive always been a dreamer]

Oh that's a cute one, Billy. I can't resist saying this but, it looks like the Pope has been yearning for life in the fast lane.

[sodascouts]

lol! I like that one!

[Molly]

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
"How was he killed?" asked one detective.
"With a golf gun," the other detective replied.
"A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?"
"I don't know but it sure made a hole in Juan."

[Brooke]

Molly!

[Billy]

cool

[Billy]

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

[Maleah]

Billy I just got that one about the cop and the pope in an email the other day.......except instead of the pope it was Billy Graham. lol

[Glennsallnighter]

I was working with a superintendent in the Irish Police force the other day. During our conversation it turned out that he is an avid Eagles fan. But he told me this (true) story which I hope you'll find funny. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

A few years ago when this man was stationed in the west of Ireland he got chatting to a neighbouring lady. She told him that she had been called up to her 8 year old son's school to meet with the principal. Assuming that it meant her young lad was in trouble she was thinking up what suitable sanction she would have to impose. It was on the lines of depriving him of some priviledge such as phone credit, his play station, the TV or his game boy. Anyway she met the principal who assured her that 'Johnny' was doing fine but had been picked on by another student and he wanted to inform the mother.
'Oh Thank God' she replied 'I was afraid that if he was in trouble I'd have to confiscate his PLAYBOY for a while'. Only when the principal started laughing did she realise that she'd mixed up 'Playstation' and 'Gameboy'.