Page 39 of 169 FirstFirst ... 293536373839404142434989139 ... LastLast
Results 381 to 390 of 1688

Thread: Good for a Laugh

  1. 05-08-2008, 06:57 AM #381
    DonFan
    DonFan is offline
    Stuck on the Border DonFan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    In the Heart of Dixie
    Posts
    3,269

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs Frey
    DF, I think your hubby needs to up the ante on programs Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 if he wants to compete with Don Henley! Grumpy Silence 2.5 just won't cut it!
    That would be nice, but unless he is able to successfully install an entirely new application--Singing/Songwriting 5.5--he doesn't stand a chance!
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  2. 05-09-2008, 12:10 PM #382
    DonFan
    DonFan is offline
    Stuck on the Border DonFan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    In the Heart of Dixie
    Posts
    3,269

    Default

    I seem to be on a roll with baaaaad married jokes lately:
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    Three women, one engaged, one married, and one a mistress are chatting about their relationships and decided to amaze their men. That night all three decided to wear black leather bras, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

    After a few days they meet up for lunch.

    The engaged woman: The other night when my boyfriend came over, he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw me and said, You are the woman of my life. I love you. Then we made love all night long.

    The mistress: Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.

    The married woman: I sent the kids to stay at my mother's house for the night. When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said, "What's for dinner, Batman?"

    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  3. 05-09-2008, 01:14 PM #383
    Ive always been a dreamer
    Ive always been a dreamer is offline
    Moderator Ive always been a dreamer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Cruising down the center of a two-way street in VA
    Posts
    20,204

    Default

    Wow - I'm just catching up on this thread, too. The last ones are great. DF - I hear ya loud and clear. If my SO tried to install Singing/Songwriting 5.5, I'm sure we'd have a system failure, so I don't even let him attempt it. I just let him upgrade NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Then, he's happy and so am I because I can then leave it to my beloved Eagles to run the Singing/Songwriting application.


    "People don't run out of dreams: People just run out of time ..."
    Glenn Frey 11/06/1948 - 01/18/2016
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  4. 05-12-2008, 02:01 AM #384
    Mrs Frey
    Mrs Frey is offline
    Stuck on the Border Mrs Frey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Cape Town, South Africa
    Posts
    2,814

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DonFan
    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs Frey
    DF, I think your hubby needs to up the ante on programs Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 if he wants to compete with Don Henley! Grumpy Silence 2.5 just won't cut it!
    That would be nice, but unless he is able to successfully install an entirely new application--Singing/Songwriting 5.5--he doesn't stand a chance!


    And then there's Drumming/Guitar Playing 9.5 he will need to invest in too!

    I love your last joke!


    I've got a peaceful, easy feeling
    And I know Glenn won't let me down
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  5. 05-12-2008, 02:02 AM #385
    Mrs Frey
    Mrs Frey is offline
    Stuck on the Border Mrs Frey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Cape Town, South Africa
    Posts
    2,814

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ive always been a dreamer
    Wow - I'm just catching up on this thread, too. The last ones are great. DF - I hear ya loud and clear. If my SO tried to install Singing/Songwriting 5.5, I'm sure we'd have a system failure, so I don't even let him attempt it. I just let him upgrade NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Then, he's happy and so am I because I can then leave it to my beloved Eagles to run the Singing/Songwriting application.



    Oh Dreamer, you're so clever!


    I've got a peaceful, easy feeling
    And I know Glenn won't let me down
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  6. 06-25-2008, 10:59 AM #386
    Billy
    Billy is offline
    Border Desperado Billy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    117

    Default

    I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

    As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

    I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

    Eric grinned, 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'

    'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

    So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

    THAT LITTLE S...
    Take It Easy
    Billy
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  7. 06-25-2008, 01:10 PM #387
    sodascouts
    sodascouts is offline
    Administrator sodascouts's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Where Faulkner collides with Elvis
    Posts
    33,665

    Default

    lol! I think I've had a few of those errors!

    Always in our hearts, Never forgotten
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  8. 06-25-2008, 04:26 PM #388
    Glennsallnighter
    Glennsallnighter is offline
    Moderator Glennsallnighter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    ... On a journey from innocence to experience..... In Ireland!
    Posts
    13,963
    Send a message via MSN to Glennsallnighter

    Default

    Me too!
    'I must be leaving soon... its your world now'
    Glenn Frey 1948-2016 RIP
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  9. 06-25-2008, 05:16 PM #389
    Brooke
    Brooke is offline
    Moderator Brooke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Down some endless road just south of nowhere (Missouri)
    Posts
    21,495

    Default

    I've definitely had some of those!
    https://i.imgur.com/CuSdAQM.jpg
    "They will never forget you 'till somebody new comes along"
    1948-2016 Gone but not forgotten
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
  10. 06-25-2008, 05:23 PM #390
    Billy
    Billy is offline
    Border Desperado Billy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    117

    Default

    STRESS RELIEF
    Close your eyes and picture yourself near a stream.
    Birds are softly chirping in the crisp, cool mountain air.
    Nothing can bother you here, no one knows this secret place.
    You are in total seclusion from that place called "the world."
    The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of
    serenity. You are so peaceful in this place and have no worries.
    The water is clear, so clear that you can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water.

    There now......feeling better?
    Take It Easy
    Billy
    Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Forum Rules