Thank you!Quote:
Originally Posted by LuvTim
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Thank you!Quote:
Originally Posted by LuvTim
As you can see, Austin, there are a lot of people around here who care about you and notice when you're not around much...myself included. I was looking forward to wishing you a Happy 30th when the "great blackout of 2018" occurred on The Border this late summer. Regardless, happy very belated 30th. Here's to hoping things turn around for you this year. Take care.
Too bad we don't have "Like" buttons here, because I'd like this x 1000. You don't feel like posting, just come by and say, "Hi."Quote:
Originally Posted by My My
Happy belated 30th, Austin.
Happy belated birthday from me, too, Austin! So sorry we missed it! :birthday:
Austin - Happy Belated 30th Birthday !
Thank you so much!Quote:
Originally Posted by My My
The birthday was good, luckily it came before this "crap storm" hit me.
Will do.Quote:
Originally Posted by CAinOH
Thank you!
That's ok. I completely understand.Quote:
Originally Posted by Brooke
Thank you!
Thanks!!Quote:
Originally Posted by New Kid In Town
Just a quick update to everyone-
I've seen the rheumatologist, infectious disease specialist, and urologist.
No bladder cancer or any issues there. Also I'm negative on the lupus and RA testing, which is great. I have OA, and have had it for many years.
I saw the infectious disease specialist today, and he thinks my issues lie with my kidneys. I'm still passing blood and protein, so my next appointment is with nephrology to see what is up with them. The bladder is fine, so it has to be kidneys at this point. That would cause the abnormal bloodwork, and most of my symptoms. It's possible that I did have an infection at some point that is now a kidney issue, but I have no active infection which is good.
So now it's just a matter of waiting for the kidney specialist. I'll update back when I have the answers from there.
I'm breathing easier knowing that lupus, bladder cancer, etc are off the table. I'm still really concerned about the prospect of kidney disease, but I'm not as stressed out as I was.
I was so happy to see your list of eliminations! It's great to be able to rule those vile things out. Now they can pin things down, and you can focus on what you need to do. I pray that your journey to taking care of your issues will be a short one. God Bless.Quote:
Originally Posted by WalshFan88
Austin, I am so glad all those things were ruled out. Hopefully, now when you see the kidney specialist they will be able help you on the road to a full recovery. Thinking of you Austin and sending prayers your way.
Thanks for letting us know what's going on, Austin. So good to hear the list of "no" things. And once they can pinpoint what it is, it will be a relief to have a game plan.
I'll keep sending good thoughts and healing thoughts your way. Take care, my friend!
Wow, this is so crazy because I seriously saw this right after I was wondering about how you were doing.Quote:
Originally Posted by WalshFan88
I'm just SO GLAD it's not cancer or those other things. Let's just get whatever it is diagnosed and treated!
Austin, fingers crossed for you! Grateful for the good news so far and hoping for the best outcome. :-)
Thanks everyone!
Austin, I hope that your doctors find the problem soon and that it will be something that's easily manageable.
I have been out of the habit of posting partly from the break but also a busy time in my life.
Like many here, I was dealing with the problems of ageing relatives. In late spring, my father-in-law reached the point where he could no longer stay safely in his own home and we had to make arrangements for him to move to a care home. Although he had decreasing mobility and increasing dementia, we tried to keep him in his own home for as long as possible, even though it was more than a three hour drive from where we live. Our biggest fear was we'd get him into a care home and he'd demand to go home and persuade a doctor that he had the mental capacity to make that decision. A few years ago, we brought him to stay with us for a few weeks while we sorted out a care at home service and he would change his mind about what he wanted several times a day, eventually calling the police to say he was being kept against his will. Eventually, after two hospitals and two care homes, he seemed to be settled and happy. We had a few pleasant weeks of visiting him and then he died at the end of the summer. We still haven't found time to clear his house.
I now find myself as the oldest generation. Over the last 11 years, I've had to deal with the deaths of both parents, my husband's uncle (who had no children) and now my father-in-law. This is fairly typical for someone of my age but it's still hard to accept. I'm not sad but I've lost some of my optimism. I'm also feeling fed up about clearing up other people's stuff and not finding time for doing what I want.
UTW - Please accept my deepest sympathy on the death of your father-in-law. It is so hard to make all those decisions for parents. Our family went through it with my mother. I noticed you had not been posting. Sending warm thoughts to you and hope things start looking up soon. Take Care, we missed you here.
UTW, let me also express my condolences. I too had noticed your absence and I'm so sorry it's due to such sad times. I'll be praying for you during what will no doubt be a hard holiday season. Man, I dread dealing with being "the oldest generation" in my family, especially since I have have no kids. It seems you have dealt with it as well as you could have in a very difficult situation.Quote:
Originally Posted by UndertheWire
Austin, good news on some things, but hope they can figure it all out for you soon and. Prayers.
UtW, I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your father in law. You have my sympathy and I can understand what you are going through. My Mom is in a care home and she is taking it very well. It was hard when we first moved her, but for the past year she has been pretty happy. I feel sorry for her as she loved her home, gardening, and cooking which she can't do now, so she is pretty bored, but it has to be this way as we had exhausted all other options. It's just sad.
Austin - I hope you feel better and get some good news soon!
UTW- I'm so sorry, my condolences for your loss.
I have a friend who has been going through a hard time, he has been through something very traumatic and is severely depressed because of it. I'm the only one he's been talking to about this; his parents are hands-off and his other friends are busy with other things. He refuses to get counseling, which I truly believe he needs, because his parents have told him it's a weakness to go. I've been trying so hard to help him and keep his spirits up, but it's been so hard...sometimes I don't know what to say, sometimes he doesn't want to talk about it and shuts down. We live 4 hours away from each other, so we talk on the phone or by text, but it's not as good as in person (and for various reasons, seeing each other in person can't happen right now). He is so paralyzed by fear and depression that he's hiding himself away and it's truly heartbreaking to hear, he was the most outgoing and friendly person I've ever met before this happened. It seems like I'm all he has to help him through this and I worry that I'm not doing enough to help, or that one day he will do something desperate. And the saddest thing is, I don't think he's even hit rock bottom yet (and I worry about that day, when he will). I'm not sure exactly why I wanted to post this here, I felt like I had to share, I guess. I don't know if I believe in prayer, but any prayers sent out into the universe would help...thank you all for listening!
I have dealt with this situation and in the end, I had to accept that I could not help her. When someone is dealing with severe depression, we can't make them better by saying the right things. There are no magic words that will make them okay. We only get caught in the cycle. You have to keep urging him to see a counselor, someone who is trained - if he doesn't have the money, he can go to a church counselor or a free clinic. Keep harping on it. If you truly feel he is suicidal, I think you should alert his parents. They may be "hands-off" and unsupportive (do they know what happened to him?) - it sounds like they have a bad relationship - but they'll want to know if their son is seriously contemplating killing himself. I'd alert anyone who lives with him so they can watch him. Again, though, I can't give expert advice. A counselor is what he needs - make getting him to one your goal.Quote:
Originally Posted by groupie2686
I will pray for you.
Thank you, soda. I have told him he needs to see a counselor before, he always declines, I will keep at it though. For whatever reason, he feels like he can't reach out for help, like it is admitting weakness, its a huge breakthrough that he's opened up to me the way he has. His parents do know and their solution is to have him run away from it -to spend a few months with different relatives who live in different places, but he's still depressed when he's there and when he returns, because he's not dealing with what happened. His parents are immigrants and they've told him he doesn't have the privilege to seek help...this is the attitude I've been fighting against. I've debated talking to them, but I feel that would be a breach of his trust. Maybe I will in the end, if it would help. He is taking a job in another city for a couple of months and the idea of him living alone, away from family and friends, worries me even more. Anyway, thank you for the prayers, they are appreciated!Quote:
Originally Posted by sodascouts
groupie, I'm so sorry about your friend's depression. I think he needs professional help too and I will keep you and him in my prayers.
Thank you, Brooke. I appreciate it. *hugs all around*
Groupie, if he won't see a councilor, would he speak to someone on a telephone helpline?
Thanks to everyone for your condolences. I'm not that sad. He had a good and long life and he was happy at the end. I just wish the last few years hadn't been marred by the changes brought on by his dementia.
I'm not sure, I've thought of that. I found a support group for people in his situation and I've thought about referring him there, he is dead set against any sort of help and I'm not sure how he will take it if I suggest it. I actually haven't heard from him in several days and every time that happens, it makes me worry like crazy. He has ADHD so he sometimes forgets to respond if he's busy and then drops off the radar for a while. I'm hoping this is one of those times. The distance is so hard.Quote:
Originally Posted by UndertheWire
UTW firstly let me send condolences to you on the passing of your FIL. Its good for you to know at least that you took time sorting out the best care possible for him and were careful to take his wishes into account. We are at the stage with my mother of acknowledging that she will soon be unable to cope at home, even with HSE carers and family backup. Some days she is fine, although she does have Parkinsons, other days she is confused and a danger to herself. But until she states that she is happy to move on to a nursing home, the HSE will not progress her application.Quote:
Originally Posted by UndertheWire
I know how you feel. It is starting to hit me too with a number of aunts, uncles and friends parents as well as friends of my own parents having passed on.I still FEEL young but know I'm not really, and those awkward conversations are starting to happen too. I wish you well
UTW - I'm so sorry for your loss.
Groupie - I've been in his shoes many times before. I don't think there is anything you can do other than keep him safe, and if need be, get ahold of the proper authorities if you are afraid of him harming himself. I will say that you are a great friend for looking out for him. I've certainly been shunned by people when I'm down and out and it's not a good feeling. Thankfully, my family and true friends are my rock. Once I got in a proper head space, the friends that decided to distance themselves and acted like what I was going through was no big deal were promptly removed from my life. I just am always glad to hear of real friends!
The longer I visit my parents, the more I see the evidence of age (they are both 76). They are doing relatively well in many ways but...Quote:
Originally Posted by Glennsallnighter
I really don't like to think about life without them and a new reality where Christmas is picking which sister's family to attach myself to at Christmastime. I know I'm lucky to have sisters, of course, and lucky to have my parents as well as they are. I try to focus on that. Still, the inevitability of it all looms.
Thanks, Austin. It's been hard but I'm determined to stick by him, especially since I know some of his other friends have bailed. I hope you're in a better place now, it sounds like you've been through a lot.Quote:
Originally Posted by WalshFan88
....or if you don't want to pick you could always experience and Irish Christmas.......Quote:
Originally Posted by sodascouts
Unfortunately I have. And it's all too common for people to bail on you. It's almost like they are afraid they are going to catch this from us like it's a "bug". It's pretty sad and it shows a character weakness IMO. I know people don't want to surround themselves around negative people for too long, but they are often selfish when choosing to do so instead of lending an ear/shoulder/etc. Again, kudos to you for not being like most people out there and actively caring about him. It means a lot to those of us who suffer from chronic mental health troubles like Depression, Anxiety, etc. It definitely makes you feel less alone and isolated.Quote:
Originally Posted by groupie2686
Thanks, Austin. It has definitely been hard, especially because he sometimes gets so depressed that he withdraws and doesn't want to talk, and I keep trying to draw him out. But I am determined not to bail on him. I'm sorry that it happened to you, are you in a better place now?Quote:
Originally Posted by WalshFan88
Just now starting the second week of the semester. The first week was pretty hectic and I spent last weekend recuperating, but I think I feel ready to get into the groove now. I hope all goes well!
Good luck Soda hope it goes well for you
Good luck, Soda!
So far this year is going well for me. Except last week when Hubby and I both had the stomach flu. Horrible! Had us both down for over two days! Hope no one here gets it! :yuk:
Otherwise, I'm just working and enjoying the snow and my grandkids..... once in a while! :lol:
Dentist appointment this morning and then to the grocery store to get a couple necessities in case we have another snowstorm this weekend and I don't make it back! Managed to pick up a prescription at the pharmacy and then left it in the checkout lane later. Now I get to go back to town after work to get it! :doh:
Thanks. Unfortunately yes, I've had more than my fair share...Quote:
Originally Posted by groupie2686
Soda - Good luck!
Brooke - Ugh. I hate stomach bugs...absolutely feel awful! Glad you're both better now.
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Well, I've seen the kidney specialist. They've sent off for a bunch of blood work and I go back in February to talk about a kidney biopsy. They think it is IgA nephropathy. It can only be detected by a biopsy, but blood work can give you some indications of it being a possibility. They did look at some cells under the microscope and I have dysmorphic red blood cells in the urine, so pretty high chance of kidney disease. :(
I'm so sorry, Austin, that sounds terrible! What can they do about it?
I've just had a week from **** at work, so I'm happy it's the weekend, except now there's supposed to be 1-2 feet of snow this weekend, so not much of a weekend for me, I'm afraid.